EAU CLAIRE -- The closure of the Hospital Sisters Health System in the Chippewa Valley meant not just a loss of medical care, but also of services that were run through the now-shuttered hospitals in the area. One of these was The Healing Place.
The Healing Place, offered until closure at Eau Claire's Sacred Heart Hospital, offered multiple forms of grief support, including one geared towards those who have endured losing a loved one to suicide.
These support groups experienced a disruption due to COVID, and then were shuttered with the early withdrawal of the hospital system from the Western Wisconsin area.
Now, people who received such support are trying to continue providing support to a group that they say need it in one of their darkest moments.
Steve Wagener is one such person. Wagener initially didn't know where to turn when his son, Nick, took his own life in 2018. He found the suicide grief support group by Googling, and attended that and therapy to try to deal with the loss of his son.
"I even went to a couple of different therapists, and what they would tell me after I told my story and after meeting with them for a few (sessions), is that they thought I should continue going to the group because they felt that was helpful," said Wagener. "That's why I did it, and I did find it very helpful."
Laurie Royce experienced a similar loss.
"In 2014, I lost my 19-year-old son Michael to suicide," said Royce. "At that point, that was when I started going to The Healing Place, and I was going to a group that was for parents who have lost a child -- any age, any reason," said Royce. "The Healing Place had multiple support groups, but that was the group I was involved in."
The Healing Place, and those receiving care there, experienced the sudden jolt with COVID in 2020, with both Royce and Wagener stating that those participating receiving mixed messages as to when -- or how -- they could have sessions at The Healing Place.
"It was just like they shut it down and then forgot about it. And that summer of 2020, we were still meeting," said Royce. "I was still doing (the support group), and we were meeting in parking lots. We were meeting at people's houses."
In cases like COVID or even now after the closures, though, Royce stated that supports groups like this are a poor fit for online meeting venues like Zoom.
"The problem is, when you're dealing with severe trauma and loss, there's something about being physically in the same room with people. I've witnessed strangers coming in, just having suffered this traumatic loss, and I can see they don't know each other. And one of them is talking about it, and they're breaking down and sobbing, and that stranger next to them will reach out and put their hand on them and comfort them," she said.
Both Wagener and Royce received training sessions through the HSHS system to help facilitate through The Healing Place, but with COVID uncertainties and, later, with the HSHS closures, they both said that they were as much in the dark as everyone else working at the hospital in terms of what that meant for any of the support groups operating through The Healing Place.
"What we kept hearing was that they're still organizing before we heard anything about them leaving," said Wagener. "Then when we heard they were going to leave, we were told that we were good until the end of March; that we didn't have to worry about finding another place."
I just remember them saying, 'By the end of March, you guys are going to have to find your own place and means.'"
Wagener and Royce, together with former HSHS employee Melissa Ives (described as a "superhero" by Wagener for her efforts), have strived to continue running the suicide support group, though it has not been easy. This has required many things including finding a new venue. Right now the group uses the basement of Eau Claire's Chippewa Valley Free Clinic in Eau Claire.
Recently it has been announced that almost $5 million was given from the HSHS system to the Eau Claire Foundation, and a recent grief survey had been announced to discuss where these funds -- originally meant for The Healing Place -- would go. Wagener stated hope yet concern at the same time since the results of the survey were not expected until May of 2025.
"If we have to wait until this whole process goes through, there's going to be a lot of people suffering in the meantime," he said. "We've already got six months into this where we have absolutely no support."
Wagener's concerns are that many people are unaware that the support group is still extant, and his fear was that people might not know where to turn upon experiencing the suicide of a loved one. He also pointed to several studies showing a much higher statistical likelihood of those bereaved from the suicide of a loved one considering suicide themselves.
Royce said that it was impossible to overstate the value of someone finding help that they need at moments when they're most vulnerable. She said that it was also invaluable to be around people who have experienced that same situation.
"For me, (the support group) was a lifeline, especially the first few years because the biggest thing it did for me is it got me out of my head," said Royce. "When you're out there and you're talking to other people, you have that empathy for them. They support you. You support them. You have that thought of, 'I'm not alone. I'm not the only one who's going through this. I can do it. We can do it together.' And that's the kind of support that you get at a time when people are really the most vulnerable and they need that."