Eric: "Happy Alone", who wrote about wanting to leave social situations because he has very poor hearing, may truly be happier alone, but if he'd like to try to participate in social gatherings or at least a conversation, he might try an app like "Live Transcribe".
My mother is very deaf (Cochlear implant in one ear, hearing aid in the other) and uses this app constantly. It's not perfect, and really not great in crowd situations, but it works well enough in one-on-one (-or two) conversations so that she understands what's going on.
Frankly, it's been a lifesaver for those of us who communicate with her regularly. And it helps her out at doctor's appointments too, because it's a written transcript.
I hope this helps "Happy Alone," unless he's truly more of an introvert.
- Reader
Dear Reader: Thank you for this suggestion. Other readers also expressed how helpful transcription apps have been. Some also mentioned a function on Apple AirPods Pro2 models that can boost conversation in noisy places. "Happy Alone" should talk to his audiologist first about the latter option or other hearing treatments, like Cochlear implants, should he want to explore that route.
Dear Eric: I love your column and find your responses thought-provoking. Your answer to "Dad's Wife" whose estranged stepdaughter wants contact with her now that the stepdaughter had a baby left out a question or two in my opinion.
Most important to me is whether the husband and wife want to build a relationship with their granddaughter and how her decision impacts that. We all live with polite fictions sometimes. If the grandchild is important to them, Wife may want to go through the motions and look for the positives, possibly even changes in the new mother, while still being a bit wary.
She also didn't mention her husband and the son-in-law's awareness and role in the daughter's behavior. There are five people now involved.
- Reader
Dear Reader: The phrase "we all live with polite fictions" is spot-on and so vivid. And also quite true, for better or worse. The letter writer felt used and belittled by the stepdaughter, so there's work to do to keep the peace. But, if grandparenthood is a priority for the letter writer, it may be worth opening up a blank document on the relationship and composing some fiction.
Dear Eric: I'm writing about "Work Disappointment", who was passed over for a promotion in favor of two coworkers who the letter writer said weren't as qualified. I had a similar thing happen to me. While it was scary, I made an appointment with the person who made the choices and very respectfully told her that I sincerely wanted to know what in my performance needed improvement, so I could work on those areas for future opportunities.
I was very proud of myself for having the courage to carry this out. While this administrator did not, in my opinion, have the same courage back to me, she did later recommend me for a promotion that was over the folks promoted earlier. And I accepted that gratefully.
I always tell my staff, "The interview is an inherently flawed process. But it's the best one we have."
- Promoted
Dear Promoted: Wonderful advice. The ability to ask for and incorporate constructive feedback is crucial to success at every point in a career. Moreover, a no, while disappointing, can often be an opportunity to learn, reframe or re-evaluate one's goals.