"Immediately, I go, 'Why would you do this on your sister's wedding day? Why would you do this?'"
Brittany Brink was in the bathroom during the bouquet toss. A bridesmaid at a wedding in Myrtle Beach last October, she needed a moment to herself.
Then, one of the other bridesmaids came looking for her. The bride, who was Brink's then-boyfriend's sister, wanted her on the dance floor.
"I'm like, really? I was almost annoyed. I'm already taken. I don't need to come out for the bouquet toss," Brink, 32, recalls to TODAY.com.
But the bride was insistent, so Brink went. Still, she took her time to the reception, stopping to get a drink. After some coaxing, she made it to the dance floor, where the bride was holding the bouquet.
Then, Brink was met with a surprise. Rather than toss the bouquet behind her, the bride, Victoria "Tori" Krause, turned around and handed Brink her flowers.
Brink's boyfriend of eight years, Rich Ciallella, stepped onto the dance floor and got down on one knee, holding their 2-year-old son Carter on his lap. In his free hand, he held a ring.
Once Brink realized what was happening, she had two reactions. The first was to "start hysterically crying." The second? "Immediately, I go, 'Why would you do this on your sister's wedding day? Why would you do this?" Brink says.
After ring shopping earlier that year, Brink had been waiting for a proposal. During each day of their recent weeklong trip to Virginia, she thought Ciallella would finally ask. But Brink hadn't been expecting this.
Proposals at weddings have often gone viral as examples of what not to do, according to etiquette experts. The risk comes in upstaging the couple on their big day. In fact, wedding real estate is such a thing, that many a reddit thread has discussed the ethics of proposing too close to a loved one's wedding's date.
So, after saying yes, Brink wanted some answers about how this potential faux pas came to be. "Just talk to her," Brink recalls her now fiancé saying. "She she was the one who wanted this to happen and be so special for you."
That's right: This wedding proposal was the bride's idea. The future groom and his sister had been brainstorming ideas for months. Then, the spring before her wedding, Krause saw a TikTok of a wedding proposal. Rather than take offense, Krause thought the plan was brilliant. She persuaded her brother out of his original idea of proposing on Mother's Day and into popping the question at her own wedding.
Once the shock of the dance floor proposal wore off, Brink approached Krause for another tearful conversation. "I told her, 'I didn't want this.' She starts crying, and she's like, 'I really wanted you to have this moment. I really wanted your aunt to be here for this proposal, because I know that you can't have your parents here," Brink recalls.
Brink's parents died within two months of each other in 2021 -- her father of an unexpected cardiac arrest and her mother following a long battle with cancer. During that span, Brink also learned she was pregnant with her son.
Brink thinks of Carter as a gift from her father. "My dad just kept telling me, 'We can't wait for Rich to give you a ring. I need another grandson,'" she says.
Brink says her son helped her cope with her parents' deaths. "He is my strength every single day. And he like, really, he pushed me to focus on, you know, being the best mom, being here for him, and just giving him all I can give," she says.
Brink also received emotional support from her fiancé's family, who rallied around her and her sister throughout the series of life-changing events.
At the wedding, Brink's fiancé's mom approached her, also in tears. 'You are my daughter. You always have been. I'm not your mom. I'm not trying to replace her, but I want to do anything I can to make this special for you,'" Brink remembers her saying.
"It was just so sweet. It was really our moment. Tori was just standing there dancing, just so happy that she was able to be a part of this whole thing and pull this off. It just meant so much to me," she says.
Since the proposal, Brink has experienced pushback from internet strangers when sharing photos.
"I understand why people say it's controversial. When I got engaged, I felt like, that's the bride's moment. But in my story, Tori was really behind this and wanted this for me. If the bride's OK with it, if everyone is OK with it, let them have their moment," she says.
Looking ahead to her own wedding in October, Brink plans to honor the community spirit she felt at her proposal.
"The amount of people that have been on my side, not only for the engagement, but when my parents passed away ... I want 'our day' to be special for everyone, and make it all about the love we've received the past few years," she says.
After weathering grief and new parenthood, Brink feels her marriage has already been tested -- and she's not married yet.
"That's what's really making us so sure and so excited for our future. Damn, we've been through it all. We've been through hell and back and we just came out even stronger," Brink says.
"Our lives are so intertwined. We're one big, giant family now -- we know we can make it."