Dear Annie: I am in a quandary. My husband (67) and I (65) are both retired; I do work from home two days a week for around seven hours or so a week now. He takes Social Security while I do not. He had no 401(k) to speak of. Me working now was to make up the difference.
My problem is my husband sees no problem or need to get a part-time job, but he does think it's OK for me to pick up extra hours should we need some extra money. We have had many discussions/arguments about this. Recently, he was a victim of a scammer who got into our joint accounts. We lost around $10,000. He has also been hacked several times in the 10 years we have been married.
I am now thinking about keeping the money I make while working separate from our joint account. I have even thought to go as far as to divvy up the bills to force him to see where the money goes. I have never thrown in his face that I provide three times the income he does, but it's getting to that point. I have also told him if he wants money, he will need to get a part-time job. He will look online for one but never follows through on it. I don't know what to do. -- Financially Screaming
Dear Financially Screaming: I agree it would be smart to start putting money in a separate account. Of course, tell your husband before you do, and make sure he understands this isn't meant to punish him but instead it's to keep some money safe in case of another emergency. To that end, I'd also recommend meeting with a financial planner. It never hurts to have a pro look over the numbers -- and with your husband's tendency to fall for scams, they might be able to ensure a little more protection over your hard-earned money.
Ultimately, you can't continue to be the sole provider for your household. Talk to your husband calmly and directly -- no arguments -- about the stress this has put you under. Marriage is all about teamwork, and you deserve to have a true partner there to shoulder these challenges.