Wouldn't it be nice if Caleb Williams can avoid this sort of thing in 2025? / Cary Edmondson-Imagn Images
Some of our tweets age well. Like those 238 posts about how Ted Lasso is the greatest show ever are looking pretty good right now.
Some of our old tweets are straight-up embarrassing. Don't you wish you could wipe those posts about how your sources tell you it's a 100% lock that the Cubs will land Juan Soto?
And some of our past tweets are just right. Here's one of mine from over two years ago that I crushed:
Unlike everybody else in the football world, Ryan Poles was thrilled with the Velus Jones Jr. pick. Me, I hated it, and I'll stand by the above tweet until the Bears relieve Poles of his duties.
Poles appears to be one of those GMs who's always determined to outsmart everybody, choosing slickness over logic, something he all but acknowledged when discussing his search for a head coach:
"We're going to cast a wide net. It's going to be a diverse group. We're turning every stone to make sure we're doing this the right way. There's going to be some names that you don't expect that are going to surprise you because we're digging deeper than we ever have before."
My consensus: Keep Caleb Williams from getting killed.
That means addressing the trenches, the skill positions, the coaches, the uniforms, and the postgame meals -- anything that makes Caleb happy and healthy is A-okay with me.
With that in mind, here's an all-offense Bears mock draft. If Poles goes this route, we'll enjoy a flock of 42-35 track meets in '25 and worry about defense in '26.
To quote me, "[Running back D'Andre] Swift's uninspiring numbers scream that the Monsters must, one way or the other, deal with the running back position in the early stages of the 2025 NFL Draft."
Well, yeah. Caleb needs a running game. Jeanty has a running game. Done deal.
The Anthony Muñoz Award winner (top high school lineman) is a plug-and-play tackle. Expect him to start his NFL career on the right side of the line.
At 6'3" and 320 pounds, the 2023 SEC All-Freshman Team member brings size and agility. He could rotate in early and earn a starting role by season's end.
Bears tight ends Cole Kmet and Gerald Everett will combine for $15.16 million in salary next season, which is far too much cheddar for their meh 2024 production.
Fanin caught 45 passes for 550 yards and six touchdowns last year, and he'll be on a rookie deal, so cut the vets, grab Fanin, sign a budget-friendly free agent, and reboot the position.
In 2024, Noel logged 750 yards and five touchdowns. At 5'10" and 190 pounds, he's not a big target, but his speed can create separation. Finding a useful WR4 in Round 5 isn't a bad thing.
A 2024 All-Big Ten First Teamer, McLaughlin anchored a gritty Buckeye offensive line. He's slightly undersized at 295 pounds, but that can easily be fixed with some protein powder and a strength trainer.
Any mathematician worth his salt will tell you that if you're cutting two old tight ends, you need to replace them with two new tight ends.
Hawes might just be that math guy, as he earned academic honors in both high school and college. At 6'5", 245 pounds, he has size and hands to be a thing.
Maybe Truss can ball, and maybe he can't, but one thing is for 100% certain: Dude's massive. At 6'7" and 320, the All-SEC second teamer, if he has even a modicum of ability, has a chance to stick.